You came into this physical world alone, and you’ll go out the same way. Oh, there are beings in spirit whose job it is to escort us in and out, but at one end you’re the one being born; and at the other end, it’s only you passing on. In between those endpoints, the quality of your life is mostly determined by your relationships with other people.
We all have soul-level agreements with others to work together on our spiritual development. These agreements are put together in the between-life state, and there can be hundreds of them. People with whom you have significant relationships are surely amongst them; but even the one you meet at a party and have a five-minute conversation with might be a soul who agreed to pop in at exactly the right time in order to provide you with a needed spark of insight.
And it works both ways. Something you say offhandedly to a passing stranger…a greeting or a smile, a piece of advice, even just a look…could be part of your fulfilling an agreement to assist that soul in its evolution. We need not be conscious of this interplay because our own intuition will prompt us when the time is right.
Furthermore, this assistance could very possibly be, on the surface, not very pleasant. A disapproving look from a stranger at the way you’re speaking to your child or spouse could be the very thing you needed as a reminder to be kind – if you choose to be open to receiving information instead of being incensed and feeling judged . An obnoxious alcoholic friend might be there to show you the way not to go. That miserable bitch at work who complains incessantly or sabotages you at every turn could be teaching you how to forgive. And, all this is taking place on many levels and in numerous directions. They’re working on their own stuff and teaching you at the same time.
When you reach a certain level of consciousness, you can begin to decide what energies you want or need more of, and seek out people who already have plenty of that, whatever it is. You might consciously seek out joyful people, or those with an abundance of confidence or any other quality. Because you do manifest your experiences in every aspect, if you hold an intention to attract these people, you will. When you interact with them, you don’t suck energy from them; you each act like tuning forks. You allow their vibrations to enter your energy field and set up a similar frequency.
On the other hand, if you don’t consciously set an intention to attract helpful frequencies, you’ll attract more of what you have already. Birds of a feather, misery loves company…and all that. Sitting around moping with like-minded Eeyores is not exactly helpful to the soul’s evolution – quite the opposite. Unfortunately, it’s often part of the comfort zone thing.
Sometimes the hardest part about relationships is knowing when they have served their purpose and are no longer in our Highest Good – and this is true whether the interaction has been positive or negative. It’s sometimes easy to stop seeing someone who teaches us by bringing pain (although, again, the comfort zone will often keep us there because the ego likes what is familiar and fears change, regardless of possible benefits). It’s a whole other thing to know when a relationship has run its course but is not obviously undesirable. There are tons of 40-year lifeless marriages that aren’t contributing to either party’s growth anymore, but simply consist of two bodies waiting together to die. I’m sure you can think of someone who was forced into a whole new (usually more growth-oriented) life by the passing or departure of a mate.
The lesson in regard to relationships is that they are an important (perhaps the most important) tool, both in our physical lives and in the evolution of our Higher Selves. We can’t go it alone and expect to make the progress we would if we chose to interact with our fellow beings, because we all bring something unique. Each of us have potential gifts, and gifts not given or received are worthless. Whether those gifts seem to be positive or negative, we need to accept them as such and use them to the utmost extent possible. Like the alchemist’s compound, the mixing of souls produces something that is more than the sum of its parts.